The Groves vending machines – a staple in every Groves students’ career and most notably, home to the greatest quarter dispenser of all time… or is it? With the introduction of the new Fresh! Healthy Vending Machines, students have become skeptical towards the machines quarter dispensing abilities. However, quarter enthusiast and expert, Oliver Cole, claims that these new vending machines have immense quarter dispensing capacity; and these vending machines, raw to the Groves student body, obtain powers that are still unknown to man. 

This unruliness caused a great disturbance amongst the Groves community.

“The Groves student body should fear no more, as not only do these vending machines dispense of a vast variety of quarters, but within these dispensers lay quarters only worthy to the eyes of Zeus himself.”  Oliver Cole, quarter expert and enthusiast said. With that, we then asked quarter expert and enthusiast Oliver Cole to not only assess, but also rank his favorite quarters that were thrown up from the depths of the vending machines quarter collector. 

During our hunt to unveil the science behind these quarter dispensers, Oliver Cole offered his insight.

 “Specializing in this field for the majority of my highschool career, I have noticed a common trend. With the rise in virtual payment in vending machines (Credit Cards, tap to pay, ext.) quarters tend to sit in the bellies of these beasts for extended periods of time. This leads to a higher percentage of rare quarters being dispensed,” Cole said.

We begin this extensive review with our finding of the famous 2023 limited edition Bessie Coleman quarter. Bessie Coleman, the first African-American and Native American woman to earn a pilot’s license is also commonly famous for her spectacular aerial shows. This quarter is one of the rarest we have come from the grasp of the Groves’ vending machines in what seems like a fiscal decade.

Second to this, we have the 2008 Hawaii quarter. When we interviewed this specifically shy quarter the only statement we got back was “E. Pluribus Unum.” This very in depth quote shows how much the state of Hawaii, and the quarter itself have been through.

From the shadows of the vending machine has also surfaced a Wilma Mankiller quarter. Don’t let the name mislead you though, as she is a very kind person. Wilma, who is a Native American activist and social worker, was also the first woman to be elected as Chief of the Cherokee Nation. Being in the presence of this quarter is not only a privilege, but an honor as well.

Now we have an Indiana cross roads quarter. This quarter rings home to Groves as Indiana is one of our sister states here in Michigan. For this particular quarter we had quarter expert and enthusiast, Oliver Cole, interview it, and it said, “E. Pluribus Unum.” This vague response we have concluded is a byproduct of the low shine left on this quarter (shine is rated a 6/10 in comparison to others).

Speaking of shine, one quarter found (illegible) seems to contain what appears to be a tree of some sorts. We even asked quarter enthusiast and expert Oliver Cole what this quarter may be and we are still waiting on a response. For this we turn to the student body of Groves and want to know if anyone could identify said quarter.

While some of the quarters remain a mystery and others a national treasure, they all tell a story and they all have had great travels in their days. There is no way to tell where these quarters have been due to their short responses when questioned. 

“These quarters have emotion. The more tarnished ones carry a sad solemn story. The newer ones carry themselves with a sense of eagerness and excitement. The older ones that have stood up to the test of time are proud of where they’ve been and where they are yet to go,” said quarter expert and enthusiast Oliver Cole.

Next time you come into possession of a quarter, Inspect it like you inspect your Orion camo in Call of Duty WWII. You may be disappointed, happy, or even beyond excited. But no matter what quarter you get, always remember: Don’t be sad it’s over, be happy it happened.